Thursday, January 7, 2010

Hello clusterfuck

Being in India has many joys, one of them is not international airport or lines or people in lines at airports.... I guess that's three things. But still.

For the record please note that a single file line should have people standing shoulder to shoulder. That sorta isn't a line by definition.

-- Posted while roaming about

Friday, January 1, 2010

I'm on an Indi-an radiooo...

Indian FM radio creates new thoughts and experiences that are simply not possible anywhere else in the world. This is not because of some magical Namsake-esque return to roots experience. Nay. It's because the playlists are so bizarro. Where else can you listen to the following three artists order: Outkast, Whitney Houston, and Rick Astley. It's like an iPod shuffle disaster.

As such it triggers healthy debates while roaming around in cars listening to the radio, namely....THERE IS NO FUCKING WAY THAT RICK ASTLEY IS WHITE. It's one of the single most bizarro things out there. You simply CANNOT listen to "Never Gonna Give You Up" with your eyes closed and tell me that you were not picturing a black guy? (please notice that I used a triple negative in that sentence. I rock)

The same can be said, but in reverse, for Billy Ocean. The only other Ocean that I know is George Clooney, and he's pretty white. Also his second stint with his fabulous robbing crew in "Ocean's 12" made no sense (if they stole the egg before it even got to Italy, why did they do all those weird antics in Italy with Julia Roberts?...besides Bruce Willis mistaking Julia Roberts for Julia Roberts was a bit odd)

Also many of you are wondering right now "when was the last time I listened to Whitney Houston's "I Will Always Love You" in full?" Well, wonder no more, because I can answer that definitively by saying a store...playing the radio. And you know what... it's a long ass song. It never ends. And it's weird to think that it got featured in "The Bodyguard". Can you imagine Whitney having to choose between Bobby Brown and Kevin Costner in life. That may be the weirdest choice a person has ever had to make.

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