Thursday, February 12, 2009

Dear General Mills

Attached below is an email I wrote to General Mills today, the maker of Cocoa Puffs, regarding my cereal incident yesterday:
Dear Mr/Mrs. General Mills,

Firstly General, I would like to thank you for your service to our country. But that's not what has caused me to write today. Yesterday while at work on the morning of February 10, 2009 I was eating Cocoa Puffs and the bowl attacked me and spilled its sweet chocolaty goodness all over my shirt. While the attack/spilling was due to no fault of you, the Cocoa Puffs themselves, or even famed mascot Sonny the Cuckoo Bird, I must admit that it has severely dampened my enthusiasm for the product

One could say that I am no longer "cuckoo for Cocoa Puffs."

While this unenthusiastic viewport is admittedly temporary I just wanted to inform you that your daily sales for the product may suffer a decline by a bowl or two over the next few days. I pray that perhaps something can be done to re-establish my joy for your product in the short-term....otherwise perhaps it is I, not Sonny, who is in fact cuckoo.

- Shakes
And so that's the email I sent via the General Mills website. I got the automated response saying they received my comment. Now it's the old waiting game...

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Asha said...

When I interned at General Mills I sat caddy-corner to the folks who took "extra special" phone calls about products. Some highlights included: "yes, you can eat the Yoplait yogurt from 1997, although we wouldn't recommend it" and "what color is the bug?"

Anonymous said...

Former work spouse guesses a coupon at the very most. Can't believe "Asha" commented!

Shakes said...

Sometimes "Asha"/Asha is my only real friend. She comments! oh does she comment, and she doesn't hide beneath the veil of "anonymous" =)

meanwhile i haven't gotten a response from General Mills yet.

ZenDenizen said...

This is even more insane than when I called Kellogg's and asked why Dig Em had yellow eyes. Was he jaundiced?