Wednesday, October 8, 2008

Things I'll Give You A Dollar For: #1

Many years ago in a former life I used to write a running a list weird things that I'd request people to do, and if they did I'd give them a dollar. That's why it was called "Things I'll Give You A Dollar For." It's pretty straightforward really....even if the list name ends in a prepositional phrase ("...For"), a grammatical no-no.

Be that as it may I figured after a little bit of encouragement that I'll end my 2 year hiatus and resume the list, here goes:

Things I'll Give You A Dollar For: #1
  1. Giving me a dollar
  2. Most stocks on the NYSE
  3. Caveatting a comment stating person's ethnicity and then stating something completely insignificant (e.g. "You Chinese and all, I guess we should cross the street" OR "For a Korean you really like hot dogs")
  4. Drop kicking one of those stupid small dogs you see people on the Upper East Side carry
  5. Finding Sisqo
  6. Leading school kids astray.
  7. Going to the L.E.S and pointing at kids saying "Man! I really like your Pumas and your cool expensive but cheap looking t-shirt...You're so counter culture!" Repeat 75 times.
  8. Gum.
  9. Wearing a McCain shirt through Union Square
  10. Asking a cab driver to please follow the Taxi Rider's Bill of Rights printed in the back seat and not talk on the phone or be excessively disturbing.
And there you have it. See, don't you think you're a better person because of this

6 comments:

Anna said...

Loving it! Welcome back to the dollar list!

Shakes said...

it's back baby it's back!

Mr. Greenbean said...

I'll give you a dollar if you can fix the economy.

ZenDenizen said...

After reading #7, will you marry me?

Anonymous said...

Get in line, girl!

-A.K.

Shakes said...

shits, what a scene...