Tuesday, July 18, 2006

Holy F@#!ing Sh#t !

Oh my! My last post created quite a firestorm. Quiiiite.

Never in the history of man has so much anger built up so quickly and so needlessly (well, current events in the Middle East notwithstanding). Moreover my random idea of commenting on another bloggers webpage and making her Hate List was totally thwarted before it got off the ground because she already found out about it by seeing my post (she's the first commenter)

So first things first, to the author of Love & Haterade I just wanted to say that I hope you got the fact that my whole post was a joke and that I don't really hate anyone, least of all you. I think your blog is pretty damn funny.

Now on to other business, a certain Anonymous person seemed quite pissed off at me. At some point I think someone has mistakenly gotten the idea that my blog is only for serious news and analysis. I can see how my indepth discussions of "Spot the Desi" and the Val Kilmer/Burger King connection may have led to this conclusion. But this strikes me as being akin to the time that Jon Stewart was accused by former CNN member Tucker Carlson of not being a serious journalist.

Now I'm not going to go into some long diatribe rebutting everything that was said, that would be boring. In fact the only thing which really annoyed me was when she/he/it (or "s/he/it" which once provoked an English prof of mine to simple say "sheiiiit") labeled me as being a "hip-hop wannabe loser poseur." First of all mucho props for consulting the Urban Dictionary on the proper of poseur. Big ups. Fer shizzle. That terminology you dropped was mad tight. Holla back boo. You must be straight trippin'.

Second I know this is gonna come to a shock to you, but most people in the civilized world recognize the phrase "Konichiwa bitches" as being a Chapelle Show reference. If that means everyone is a poseur than so be it. (by the way, do you also pronounce the word "mature" as "ma-Tooor" the way learned people do?).

Be that as it may, name-calling is not really important here, nor is it good for ratings. Instead it makes me a bit more curious as to who "Anonymous" could really be. After analyzing Sheiiit's beautiful two-parted piece of prose for a moment, let's see what clues we are left with as far ascertaining their true identity:

  • she/he/it seems to lack any ability to detect not-so-subtle humor
  • she/he/it gets easily upset over trivial issues
  • she/he/it has no problem in being illogically critical of me
I think we can all know that the answer is pretty clear. In fact I'm a little ashamed at myself for taking so long to figure it out....

..."Anonymous" must be my mom.

Somehow, someway mom has apparently found my blog after rummaging through a myriad of Indian matrimonial sites (caste no bar) and internet super discount coupon links and blammo, she ended up here. Well hello mom, welcome to my blog, and for the final time, I know this is counterintuitive, but oddly enough on Windows in order to STOP the computer you have to actually press the START button to turn it off. Don't just hit the power switch.

Good night and good luck


DudeCirca1988 said...

At the age of 17 I told my friends "let's go steal paint cans from the garages of elderly people". Both of them (OK, I really had only 1 friend but his dad hung out with us from time to time) said "that's pathetic". I retorted, "dudes, clearly I was kidding. Lighten up. Get a sense of humor." They replied, "no, you are missing our point, that's just pathetic." I laughed and sighed, "dudes, no, you are missing the point. I was just kidding. Don't take things so seriously."

It is amazing to me that some dudes can be so blatantly unaware of the point.

Oh well.

Great post, Shakes.

Shakes said...

hey man, thanks for the support. that's really sweet of you.