Saturday, May 20, 2006

Signs you have Indian parents

Long before there was hip hop and rappers, there were desi rhymers...Indian elders. Indian parents/grandparents/aunts/uncles rhyme things that make no sense. Essentially Indian parents will take a word and make-up a word that uses most of the same letters but doesn't exist. For anyone growing up in an Indian household, here are some classic lines:
  • "What time are you getting back from your party-shmarty?"
  • "Are you going to be wearing those baggy pant-bants to the temple?"
  • "It is not good to do all that drinking-binking business"
  • "What happened to that Pat Sajack-bayjack chap from Wheel of Fortune?"
... and for any high school teacher that has told you that there is no word in the Engligh language that rhymes with "orange" has clearly never met a desi parent:
  • "Hey, stop eating that orange-borange"
For the record according to an Indian parent, a party is any gathering of more than 2 people with the potential presence of music and/or food. Thus every social gathering in the history of humankind has been a "party."
  • jury duty? a party.
  • the French Revolution? a party.
  • Boston Tea Party? massive party, almost rave-esque.
Parties, as they will promptly tell you, are where "THE drugs" are used and where "THE bad elements" hang out. The word "THE" must always be added before key nouns in order to stress them. On an unrelated sidenote Indian elders will never use the term "shorts" instead they will always say "short-pants."

Likewise, the Elders will never simply say "jeans," they'll say "jean-pants." As in, "you should wear a pair of proper fitting jean-pants, that doesn't look good. People will talk."


The Great Ganesha said...

hahaha! that's good.

i'm a particularly big fan of the use of the word "the" randomly strewn through sentences...especially when its pronounced "thee" as if that makes it somehow more relevant/pertinent...

Triskadelphia said...

OMG! I want Indian parents, like, sooooo bad now!

Swathi said...

thatz so funny esp. the one which rhymes with orange...

Swapna said...

That was funny...

Half-pants - I've only heard them ever used in India - in all other places, they are shorts. :)