Wednesday, April 26, 2006

Shakes 101: verbal kung fu part 2... more words & phrases that I use

The emails, faxes, and phone calls have been coming in non-stop ever since my first edition of Shakes 101. This is remarkable because I don't even have a fax machine nor am I quite sure how you people got a hold of my home phone number. Be that as it may, in the continued quest to be like me, I've unveield my next edition of Shakes 101, words and phrases that I use on a regular basis:

  • S.I.G. - Shady Indian Guys. This is my own acronym and I take great pride in it. SIG's are everywhere, especially in NY, some of you date them, and most all of us have seen them fight...each other. SIG's are at every desi party and usually will wear all black with slicked back hair (Parachute coconut hair oil is the best...good call Arati). You can also spot wannabe SIG's on flights to India when normal kids try to act thugged out upon their arrival back in the motherland. It helps show-off their American-ness and it's a pleasing sight for adoring grandparents and aunts alike.
  • "keep it gully" or "K.I.G." - 100% from my cousin Vivek (and oddly Busta Rhymes too, but it means more of keeping it crazy in his sense), gully means street in hindi, so this basically says "keep it street." I've been keeping it street since 1978.
  • servant - Used as an adjective, not a noun, again this orginates from Vivek. Anything which is less than optimal has servant in front of it. For example
    • "what a servant club this is"
    • "this is a horrible servant plan"
    • "what a servant restaurant this is"

  • 'splain me - This is just a shortened version of "can you explain this to me?" used in the context it would look like this "Um, 'splain me this servant plan of yours?"
Just to make sure you're practicing, let's review our bonus word from last time:
  • bakri chod - Again, this is my own hybid curse word meaning goat f#&%er.


witnee said...

sadly I will be away from engine engine # 9 for a few days. Mayhapsly my desar will pick up some S.I.G's trying to K.I.G. in L.A., If so I shall just return their desi stare and say "'splain me why you S.I.G's are all bakri chods?" Thankfully Shakes 101 has prepared me quite well for the world at large. Quiteeee well.

Shakes said...

whoa, i'm changing lives one at a time.

arati said...

You spelled my name wrong, but thanks for the shout-out.

Shakes said...

ahh! typo! fixed now, totally unintentional

arati said...


twinkletoes said...

this 101 stuff is great for the uninitiated like moi...
thankoo , thankoo we sall use these words recklessly, with your blessings of course.